Post by Rain on Nov 24, 2014 12:28:33 GMT -5
Good evening, class.
First things first - this is Cowardice 101. Everyone please check your schedules very closely and make sure you're supposed to be here. Some of you aren't; I can see it in your faces. That's all right, though - I'm sure you're either looking for Backstage Politics 300 or Relevance 105. Is that right? I thought it might be. At any rate, those are both across the hall. Hurry up and head over there; from what I can tell, some of you are in dire need of instruction in both of those fields.
All right...is that it? Anyone else? Wonderful, let's go down the class roster and make sure everyone's present.
Joey the Bastard? ...ah, there you are.
Yep, that's it. Everyone's present and accounted for. I swear, this course gets fuller and fuller each semester...but enough about that. It's time to get down to business.
Welcome, class, to Cowardice 101. I am your instructor for this semester - I go by many names, as I'm sure you are all aware, but for the sake of convenience, you may simply address me as "Rain".
Especially you, Mr. Bastard. You may only address me as "Rain".
Now, this course will vary sharply from others you all have taken in the past. We will cover elements of psychology, touch on bits and pieces of social dynamics, delve into the anatomy of the human condition, and even examine such controversial topics as genetic superiority and survival of the fittest. I'm sure you are all very excited to get to those later topics, but first, we are going to examine your prior knowledge.
Considering this is a Monday, we will be having a little pretest of sorts. Put your books away, class, and take out a pencil and a sheet of paper.
Ready? Let's begin.
---
The camera comes to life, showing Rain sitting on a steel chair in the middle of a wrestling ring. The Phenom is dressed casually - a black long-sleeved shirt with a white tee over it, a pair of bootcut jeans, and sneakers.
Rain: Might as well get the obvious stuff out of the way first - as you can see, I'm sitting in the middle of a wrestling ring.
He takes one hand off of his lap and makes a quick sweeping motion with it, gesturing to the ring around him.
Rain: There's not a lot to see right now - the lights in this particular arena are dimmed, the PA system is quiet, and the seats are currently devoid of any fans. But if you're like me - if you've chosen to make this industry yours - then you know just how much goes on in between these ropes.
The Phenom nods, affirming his words.
Rain: Words, both benign and malicious, are exchanged. Friendships are made and unmade; trust is simultaneously earned and broken. Backs are stabbed, and wars are waged.
Taking both hands off of his lap, the Phenom spreads his arms wide; at the same time, the camera retreats back a ways, presenting the viewer with the wrestling ring in its entirety.
Rain: A wrestling ring is many things - a podium, a soapbox, a proving ground, and a battlefield. But something it isn't often recognized as...
A smile twists the Phenom's features.
Rain: ...is a classroom.
Rain pauses for a few seconds, giving the notion ample time to sink in. Bringing his arms back in, he replaces them on his lap again, pressing reflexively against his lower abdomen.
Rain: Yes, a classroom. Contrary to popular belief, there's a great deal of learning to be done in and around this ring; more, some would argue, than can be done in a standard classroom environment.
The Phenom gets to his feet, folding the chair meticulously. He then goes over to the left side of the ring, reaches out through the ropes, and pulls in a practice dummy that has been resting against the ring apron, unseen until now.
Rain: Take physics, for example.
He hooks the dummy up and hits a Snap Suplex.
CRACK
The dummy's artificial body hits the mat with a loud, wooden crack that reverberates eerily through the empty arena, and its body flops lifelessly from the impact. Rain sits back up and smiles into the camera, not getting to his feet just yet.
Rain: You just saw concepts like centripetal force, kinetic energy, and velocity at work, all in a simple maneuver like a Snap Suplex. But that, my dear students, is just the tip of the iceberg.
Rain gets nimbly to his feet and dusts his shirt off, smoothing it flat against his toned, muscular torso.
Rain: Think about tag team matches. Think about the occasions in Triple Threats or Fatal Four-Ways when you and a supposed enemy of yours create a temporary alliance, all for the sake of eliminating a common foe. Those instances? Social dynamics and threat management, coming together at the same time. Fascinating, isn't it?
He scratches his chin for a moment, and then nods to himself.
Rain: I think that's fascinating. But enough about me...
Rain smiles again, and points a finger at the camera.
Rain: Let's talk about you. Yes, you. Because you see, as a wrestler, there is no one subject you can learn more about in the ring than yourself. It's true - our inner character is revealed, even defined, by way of how we conduct ourselves in between these ropes. The approach we take to handling a certain situation, to overcoming a certain opponent, can speak volumes about who we are as a person.
The Phenom takes a deep breath. He goes back over to the steel chair and unfolds it, sitting back down, this time crossing his arms over his chest.
Rain: I offer myself up as an example - stop me if you've heard this one before. A couple nights ago, at the Raw event, my character and integrity - as a wrestler, person, and as a man - were called into question when I won my match against Joey the Bastard through questionable means. I'm willing to bet you've all heard the story by now: Zak Shields stuck his nose where it didn't belong and in the process tarnished a victory that would've been mine regardless.
Rain rubs a hand across his face, clearly irritated by the mere recollection of the incident, but he keeps his temper under control nonetheless.
Rain: And now...now Joey the Bastard, and the New Age as a whole, has the gall to question my character, my integrity. He's referred to me as a bandwagoner...a corporate peon...Thy WWE's golden boy...and perhaps worst of all, a coward.
He laughs mirthlessly, bowing his head forward and shaking it in amazement.
Rain: Heh...can you believe that?
He gives another shake of the head.
Rain: The group blindsides me during my match, beats the tar out of Gabriel North, and I'm the coward. Yeah, right - that makes perfect sense.
Laughing to himself again, Rain raises his eyes back up to the camera.
Rain: It's not just that, though. To anyone well-versed in the studies of the human psyche, it's obvious that Joey the Bastard's attempts to portray me as a coward are little more than vain attempts to cover up his own fear of conflict, his own aversion to confrontation.
Rain taps his temple, hinting at the mental processes necessary to arrive at such a conclusion. The smile upon his face has widened considerably, and taken on what is perhaps a derisive curl.
Rain: He fancies himself the best - or at least, he did, back before he encountered yours truly. Now, though, his position as the best has met a serious challenge to its legitimacy; his self-image as an unstoppable paradigm has been shaken. And instead of facing it head-on and letting whatever abilities he has speak for themselves, he's chosen the path of least resistance - the path of verbal degradation, of harsh words, and of verbal putdowns from the safety of whatever mansion he happens to be in at the time.
The Phenom shakes his head a third time; this time, though, the expression on his face is more telling of disappointment than anything else.
Rain: Joey has tried using words to get inside my head, to break down my mental game, because he knows that succeeding in that regard will affect my physical game as well. He has chosen that path because...well, let's be honest.
Rain flashes a toothy grin, and shrugs his shoulders.
Rain: He needs my physical game to be affected. As far as sheer athletic ability goes, as far as pure talent in the ring, Joey the Bastard can't touch me. He knows it, too - otherwise, he would be more than content to let the work he does in the ring do the talking. But he can't afford to do that - if he only lets his wrestling ability do the talking, then nothing said on his behalf will be worth listening to.
The Phenom gets to his feet, folding the chair up and placing it flat on the ring mat.
Rain: Regardless of whether its his words or his actions doing the talking, I'll be shutting him up on Raw. That's the other thing you learn in a wrestling ring - from the first time you step in, you see the concept of group dynamics in action. This coming Raw, for instance...
Rain smiles again, baring his teeth in a savage, predatory grin.
Rain: You'll get to see a prime example of the Alpha Male beating an insurgent into submission.
---
That's all for today, class. I hope you learned a lot. I like to think that those select few students who sign up for this course do so because they feel an unexplained attachment to the material, as though it directly pertains to them in some way.
Perhaps it relates to you in some way, as well. But that's a talk for another day; go on now, I'm sure some of you have things to do, places to be.
One last thing, though - if you have the time, please stop by the lecture hall tonight, when I put on a demonstration of how the Alpha Male of a particular social group will react to an immature youngling's attempt to usurp his place. Oftentimes, gratuitous violence ensues, which I'm sure a great many of you will enjoy.
Oh, and Mr. Bastard...
I'll see you tonight. Try not to be late.
First things first - this is Cowardice 101. Everyone please check your schedules very closely and make sure you're supposed to be here. Some of you aren't; I can see it in your faces. That's all right, though - I'm sure you're either looking for Backstage Politics 300 or Relevance 105. Is that right? I thought it might be. At any rate, those are both across the hall. Hurry up and head over there; from what I can tell, some of you are in dire need of instruction in both of those fields.
All right...is that it? Anyone else? Wonderful, let's go down the class roster and make sure everyone's present.
Joey the Bastard? ...ah, there you are.
Yep, that's it. Everyone's present and accounted for. I swear, this course gets fuller and fuller each semester...but enough about that. It's time to get down to business.
Welcome, class, to Cowardice 101. I am your instructor for this semester - I go by many names, as I'm sure you are all aware, but for the sake of convenience, you may simply address me as "Rain".
Especially you, Mr. Bastard. You may only address me as "Rain".
Now, this course will vary sharply from others you all have taken in the past. We will cover elements of psychology, touch on bits and pieces of social dynamics, delve into the anatomy of the human condition, and even examine such controversial topics as genetic superiority and survival of the fittest. I'm sure you are all very excited to get to those later topics, but first, we are going to examine your prior knowledge.
Considering this is a Monday, we will be having a little pretest of sorts. Put your books away, class, and take out a pencil and a sheet of paper.
Ready? Let's begin.
---
The camera comes to life, showing Rain sitting on a steel chair in the middle of a wrestling ring. The Phenom is dressed casually - a black long-sleeved shirt with a white tee over it, a pair of bootcut jeans, and sneakers.
Rain: Might as well get the obvious stuff out of the way first - as you can see, I'm sitting in the middle of a wrestling ring.
He takes one hand off of his lap and makes a quick sweeping motion with it, gesturing to the ring around him.
Rain: There's not a lot to see right now - the lights in this particular arena are dimmed, the PA system is quiet, and the seats are currently devoid of any fans. But if you're like me - if you've chosen to make this industry yours - then you know just how much goes on in between these ropes.
The Phenom nods, affirming his words.
Rain: Words, both benign and malicious, are exchanged. Friendships are made and unmade; trust is simultaneously earned and broken. Backs are stabbed, and wars are waged.
Taking both hands off of his lap, the Phenom spreads his arms wide; at the same time, the camera retreats back a ways, presenting the viewer with the wrestling ring in its entirety.
Rain: A wrestling ring is many things - a podium, a soapbox, a proving ground, and a battlefield. But something it isn't often recognized as...
A smile twists the Phenom's features.
Rain: ...is a classroom.
Rain pauses for a few seconds, giving the notion ample time to sink in. Bringing his arms back in, he replaces them on his lap again, pressing reflexively against his lower abdomen.
Rain: Yes, a classroom. Contrary to popular belief, there's a great deal of learning to be done in and around this ring; more, some would argue, than can be done in a standard classroom environment.
The Phenom gets to his feet, folding the chair meticulously. He then goes over to the left side of the ring, reaches out through the ropes, and pulls in a practice dummy that has been resting against the ring apron, unseen until now.
Rain: Take physics, for example.
He hooks the dummy up and hits a Snap Suplex.
CRACK
The dummy's artificial body hits the mat with a loud, wooden crack that reverberates eerily through the empty arena, and its body flops lifelessly from the impact. Rain sits back up and smiles into the camera, not getting to his feet just yet.
Rain: You just saw concepts like centripetal force, kinetic energy, and velocity at work, all in a simple maneuver like a Snap Suplex. But that, my dear students, is just the tip of the iceberg.
Rain gets nimbly to his feet and dusts his shirt off, smoothing it flat against his toned, muscular torso.
Rain: Think about tag team matches. Think about the occasions in Triple Threats or Fatal Four-Ways when you and a supposed enemy of yours create a temporary alliance, all for the sake of eliminating a common foe. Those instances? Social dynamics and threat management, coming together at the same time. Fascinating, isn't it?
He scratches his chin for a moment, and then nods to himself.
Rain: I think that's fascinating. But enough about me...
Rain smiles again, and points a finger at the camera.
Rain: Let's talk about you. Yes, you. Because you see, as a wrestler, there is no one subject you can learn more about in the ring than yourself. It's true - our inner character is revealed, even defined, by way of how we conduct ourselves in between these ropes. The approach we take to handling a certain situation, to overcoming a certain opponent, can speak volumes about who we are as a person.
The Phenom takes a deep breath. He goes back over to the steel chair and unfolds it, sitting back down, this time crossing his arms over his chest.
Rain: I offer myself up as an example - stop me if you've heard this one before. A couple nights ago, at the Raw event, my character and integrity - as a wrestler, person, and as a man - were called into question when I won my match against Joey the Bastard through questionable means. I'm willing to bet you've all heard the story by now: Zak Shields stuck his nose where it didn't belong and in the process tarnished a victory that would've been mine regardless.
Rain rubs a hand across his face, clearly irritated by the mere recollection of the incident, but he keeps his temper under control nonetheless.
Rain: And now...now Joey the Bastard, and the New Age as a whole, has the gall to question my character, my integrity. He's referred to me as a bandwagoner...a corporate peon...Thy WWE's golden boy...and perhaps worst of all, a coward.
He laughs mirthlessly, bowing his head forward and shaking it in amazement.
Rain: Heh...can you believe that?
He gives another shake of the head.
Rain: The group blindsides me during my match, beats the tar out of Gabriel North, and I'm the coward. Yeah, right - that makes perfect sense.
Laughing to himself again, Rain raises his eyes back up to the camera.
Rain: It's not just that, though. To anyone well-versed in the studies of the human psyche, it's obvious that Joey the Bastard's attempts to portray me as a coward are little more than vain attempts to cover up his own fear of conflict, his own aversion to confrontation.
Rain taps his temple, hinting at the mental processes necessary to arrive at such a conclusion. The smile upon his face has widened considerably, and taken on what is perhaps a derisive curl.
Rain: He fancies himself the best - or at least, he did, back before he encountered yours truly. Now, though, his position as the best has met a serious challenge to its legitimacy; his self-image as an unstoppable paradigm has been shaken. And instead of facing it head-on and letting whatever abilities he has speak for themselves, he's chosen the path of least resistance - the path of verbal degradation, of harsh words, and of verbal putdowns from the safety of whatever mansion he happens to be in at the time.
The Phenom shakes his head a third time; this time, though, the expression on his face is more telling of disappointment than anything else.
Rain: Joey has tried using words to get inside my head, to break down my mental game, because he knows that succeeding in that regard will affect my physical game as well. He has chosen that path because...well, let's be honest.
Rain flashes a toothy grin, and shrugs his shoulders.
Rain: He needs my physical game to be affected. As far as sheer athletic ability goes, as far as pure talent in the ring, Joey the Bastard can't touch me. He knows it, too - otherwise, he would be more than content to let the work he does in the ring do the talking. But he can't afford to do that - if he only lets his wrestling ability do the talking, then nothing said on his behalf will be worth listening to.
The Phenom gets to his feet, folding the chair up and placing it flat on the ring mat.
Rain: Regardless of whether its his words or his actions doing the talking, I'll be shutting him up on Raw. That's the other thing you learn in a wrestling ring - from the first time you step in, you see the concept of group dynamics in action. This coming Raw, for instance...
Rain smiles again, baring his teeth in a savage, predatory grin.
Rain: You'll get to see a prime example of the Alpha Male beating an insurgent into submission.
---
That's all for today, class. I hope you learned a lot. I like to think that those select few students who sign up for this course do so because they feel an unexplained attachment to the material, as though it directly pertains to them in some way.
Perhaps it relates to you in some way, as well. But that's a talk for another day; go on now, I'm sure some of you have things to do, places to be.
One last thing, though - if you have the time, please stop by the lecture hall tonight, when I put on a demonstration of how the Alpha Male of a particular social group will react to an immature youngling's attempt to usurp his place. Oftentimes, gratuitous violence ensues, which I'm sure a great many of you will enjoy.
Oh, and Mr. Bastard...
I'll see you tonight. Try not to be late.
