Post by Niall on May 26, 2014 18:39:13 GMT -5
Saturday 24th May 2014
PoT's Home, Belfast, Ireland
The scene opens up in the home of the Professor of Thuganomics, Bob Cena in Belfast, Ireland. Cena is preparing to fly off to America for this weeks edition of Monday Night Raw but first he and Crack are setting up for this weeks edition of 'PoTV'. Cena is wearing a red shirt that reads "I'm a Pro Wrestling Guy" with a pair of grey Canterbury sweats and his standing against a framed poster of Bob Cena holding the ThyWWE World Heavyweight Championship over his head. Crack is wearing a black OFU hoodie with a pair of jeans and he is holding an IPhone 5s to record this weeks episode.
Crack:
1, 2, 3, go!
Bob Cena:
So we got Blade LaVigne, who bitches to the crowd to gain some rep,
When all your promos are just filler, you dont gain no respect,
It's the same shit every week, you're just a carbon copy of the generic mould that's been set,
You've beat this gimmick into the ground, man that you cant even question,
You're producing the same lines over and over like Bart in detention,
All of this future nonsense, it's clear it's a scam,
For recycling garbage, it's clear you'll get canned,
Catchphrases are for untalented hacks with no style or substance so they're just bland,
You're just an uncreative bitch who cant provide new material for fans,
Have you ever improved? We dont need to go dwell,
"I'm the future" "You'll thank me in the end" you're in need of some help,
You're like Timmy from South Park with the promos you've dealt,
Just a big headed retard who keeps repeaing himself,
He sats "I'm the future" like every 4 sentences, so creative,
How can you be so cocky when you're no one's favourite?
Besides losing to Joey The Bastard, what are your achievements?
It aint a coral sea when I say that there's a grave barrier between us,
Blade's always on his knees at his house,
So much semen has been in that mouth,
He could get a girl pregnant just by eating her out,
You are McMahon's whipping boy, he pays for nothing, Vince pays for his flights and shit,
Blade gets to handpick his opponents, he chooses who he fights and shit,
The adrenaline you get for a match boosts your ability, his senses perk up and shit,
But it wont happen this time, not after I shed some light on this,
Bitch the only sense that I've heightened is your fucking sense of entitlement.
Joey The Bastard, I know your policy,
You rely on in ring work because your promos are mediocrity,
I can pick him apart, serious or comedy,
Your pathetic attempt at being a babyface is a novelty,
Think they will begin to like you by pandering to them constantly,
You think they will dig the lame 80s babyface schtick because its old but this aint palaentology,
You went soft on Troy Motor, I dont care if he's your brethren,
The more I beat somebody, the more I respect him,
I'd keep on top of him, violent until the final second,
I'd put my own dog down like Will Smith in I Am Legend,
I'll have you seeing stars all day like celebrity stalkers,
Try to escape, I'm letting you wander
I'll catch you on the run like an Irish republican bomber,
In these trenches so long, I've got a medal of honour,
Prepare to be slaughtered,
I'll feast on you like Jeffrey Dahmer,
All you have is aggression but my style is stronger,
I'll shut you up if you start to hollar,
Like a barking collar,
Sparking thoughts like arson plottersm
Heartless monster,
As smart as Harvard scholars,
I'll start to conquer armies like George W's father.
I know that a lot of people are wondering how Undefined being in this big chamber has happened,
Cause for the last 2 months, 9 out of 10 people's natural reaction,
Has been "Really? Undefined? He's clashing the champion?
That's kinda odd,
I dont even think this guy is close to hot,
What the fuck did he do to earn a title shot?"
His career is still a kiddo,
This is baby in a box like cot death syndrome,
I know it seems absurd,
But what if its me v Undefined first 2 in the chamber, what will I do if that shit occured?
I've been thinking about it, and he certainly aint no Christopher Daniels,
That first 2 will just be something light, target practice, keeping it casual,
This is ThyWWE so you know, anything's possible,
But you're a punching bag, everyone agrees this dude's horrible,
So I considered it,
And thought if I didnt want him in the match I'm an idiot,
That's just turning down light work like a dimmer switch,
That would be a spot of practicing, you know pre kick off stretch or 2,
Shadow boxing in the dressing room,
Sound check before your set is due,
Picture the scene, my outfit jet black,
I got a crateful of spray paint at night at a building, round the back,
Get busy until my arms ache and my legs cramp,
Or I get a pain in my neck or back,
I paint a masterpiece that gets snapped,
And its evidence to be used against me if I get nabbed,
Take all that time and effort and equate it to the other 6 in this match,
Me v Undefined is the pencil drawing in the sketch pad,
You've made a name for yourself but dont get gassed,
Because us veterans, we dont respect that,
It's plane to see that since you touched down, shits been catching up with you like jet lag.
Look, before I got on to Zak I need to speak a second,
I can wash over it but I know that this needs addressing,
Cause he was present,
To see that sorry scene of vengence,
I was stumbling and messing up, after it I couldnt even speak a sentence,
Disappointed? Yeah but I keep it in perspective,
I had a bad day at the office but it comes with the profession,
I apologise to my fans and I hope my apology is accepted,
You see a mistake is a learning curve when you heed the lesson,
Even when you stumble or you fall, you dont stop you keep it stepping,
So for those who felt the need to question,
Was that the end of PoT's progression?
It was ring rust, slow down and take it easy brethren,
One thing that match made clear,
I aint been moving much but I swear I never got out of second gear,
From here on, its pedal to the metal, wont go down without a fight,
I'm Spurred on to go past peeps like Eriksen on the right,
You think I wouldnt go into the Chamber and out some lights?
I made a mistake! I didnt forget how to fight!
You're trapped in the ring with a master, and there's nowhere to go,
So lets make like Bang Bus. And get this fucking show on the road!
Cena turns around to reveal that the back of his shirt says "The Champion Pro Wrestling Deserves". He holds out his arms as the scene fades to darkness.
PoT's Home, Belfast, Ireland
The scene opens up in the home of the Professor of Thuganomics, Bob Cena in Belfast, Ireland. Cena is preparing to fly off to America for this weeks edition of Monday Night Raw but first he and Crack are setting up for this weeks edition of 'PoTV'. Cena is wearing a red shirt that reads "I'm a Pro Wrestling Guy" with a pair of grey Canterbury sweats and his standing against a framed poster of Bob Cena holding the ThyWWE World Heavyweight Championship over his head. Crack is wearing a black OFU hoodie with a pair of jeans and he is holding an IPhone 5s to record this weeks episode.
Crack:
1, 2, 3, go!
Bob Cena:
So we got Blade LaVigne, who bitches to the crowd to gain some rep,
When all your promos are just filler, you dont gain no respect,
It's the same shit every week, you're just a carbon copy of the generic mould that's been set,
You've beat this gimmick into the ground, man that you cant even question,
You're producing the same lines over and over like Bart in detention,
All of this future nonsense, it's clear it's a scam,
For recycling garbage, it's clear you'll get canned,
Catchphrases are for untalented hacks with no style or substance so they're just bland,
You're just an uncreative bitch who cant provide new material for fans,
Have you ever improved? We dont need to go dwell,
"I'm the future" "You'll thank me in the end" you're in need of some help,
You're like Timmy from South Park with the promos you've dealt,
Just a big headed retard who keeps repeaing himself,
He sats "I'm the future" like every 4 sentences, so creative,
How can you be so cocky when you're no one's favourite?
Besides losing to Joey The Bastard, what are your achievements?
It aint a coral sea when I say that there's a grave barrier between us,
Blade's always on his knees at his house,
So much semen has been in that mouth,
He could get a girl pregnant just by eating her out,
You are McMahon's whipping boy, he pays for nothing, Vince pays for his flights and shit,
Blade gets to handpick his opponents, he chooses who he fights and shit,
The adrenaline you get for a match boosts your ability, his senses perk up and shit,
But it wont happen this time, not after I shed some light on this,
Bitch the only sense that I've heightened is your fucking sense of entitlement.
Joey The Bastard, I know your policy,
You rely on in ring work because your promos are mediocrity,
I can pick him apart, serious or comedy,
Your pathetic attempt at being a babyface is a novelty,
Think they will begin to like you by pandering to them constantly,
You think they will dig the lame 80s babyface schtick because its old but this aint palaentology,
You went soft on Troy Motor, I dont care if he's your brethren,
The more I beat somebody, the more I respect him,
I'd keep on top of him, violent until the final second,
I'd put my own dog down like Will Smith in I Am Legend,
I'll have you seeing stars all day like celebrity stalkers,
Try to escape, I'm letting you wander
I'll catch you on the run like an Irish republican bomber,
In these trenches so long, I've got a medal of honour,
Prepare to be slaughtered,
I'll feast on you like Jeffrey Dahmer,
All you have is aggression but my style is stronger,
I'll shut you up if you start to hollar,
Like a barking collar,
Sparking thoughts like arson plottersm
Heartless monster,
As smart as Harvard scholars,
I'll start to conquer armies like George W's father.
I know that a lot of people are wondering how Undefined being in this big chamber has happened,
Cause for the last 2 months, 9 out of 10 people's natural reaction,
Has been "Really? Undefined? He's clashing the champion?
That's kinda odd,
I dont even think this guy is close to hot,
What the fuck did he do to earn a title shot?"
His career is still a kiddo,
This is baby in a box like cot death syndrome,
I know it seems absurd,
But what if its me v Undefined first 2 in the chamber, what will I do if that shit occured?
I've been thinking about it, and he certainly aint no Christopher Daniels,
That first 2 will just be something light, target practice, keeping it casual,
This is ThyWWE so you know, anything's possible,
But you're a punching bag, everyone agrees this dude's horrible,
So I considered it,
And thought if I didnt want him in the match I'm an idiot,
That's just turning down light work like a dimmer switch,
That would be a spot of practicing, you know pre kick off stretch or 2,
Shadow boxing in the dressing room,
Sound check before your set is due,
Picture the scene, my outfit jet black,
I got a crateful of spray paint at night at a building, round the back,
Get busy until my arms ache and my legs cramp,
Or I get a pain in my neck or back,
I paint a masterpiece that gets snapped,
And its evidence to be used against me if I get nabbed,
Take all that time and effort and equate it to the other 6 in this match,
Me v Undefined is the pencil drawing in the sketch pad,
You've made a name for yourself but dont get gassed,
Because us veterans, we dont respect that,
It's plane to see that since you touched down, shits been catching up with you like jet lag.
Look, before I got on to Zak I need to speak a second,
I can wash over it but I know that this needs addressing,
Cause he was present,
To see that sorry scene of vengence,
I was stumbling and messing up, after it I couldnt even speak a sentence,
Disappointed? Yeah but I keep it in perspective,
I had a bad day at the office but it comes with the profession,
I apologise to my fans and I hope my apology is accepted,
You see a mistake is a learning curve when you heed the lesson,
Even when you stumble or you fall, you dont stop you keep it stepping,
So for those who felt the need to question,
Was that the end of PoT's progression?
It was ring rust, slow down and take it easy brethren,
One thing that match made clear,
I aint been moving much but I swear I never got out of second gear,
From here on, its pedal to the metal, wont go down without a fight,
I'm Spurred on to go past peeps like Eriksen on the right,
You think I wouldnt go into the Chamber and out some lights?
I made a mistake! I didnt forget how to fight!
You're trapped in the ring with a master, and there's nowhere to go,
So lets make like Bang Bus. And get this fucking show on the road!
Cena turns around to reveal that the back of his shirt says "The Champion Pro Wrestling Deserves". He holds out his arms as the scene fades to darkness.
